Wednesday, March 7, 2012

City-dwellers: 13 Reasons Not To Live Alone

The Internet is aflutter with reports on the growing trend of city-dwellers choosing to live alone.

Nothing wrong with that. But as a young professional in New York City, I have enjoyed the many benefits of sharing an apartment with others, usually peers. Here are just a few:

1. Expanding social and professional networks

2. Almost always having company available - good for my typically introverted self!

3. Meeting a potential romantic interest through a roommate - happened to me a year ago - we're still going strong!

4. Free food - Isn't it swell when a roommate goes on a diet and you inherit her frozen ice cream sandwiches?

5. Following a positive role model - Two of my roommates are very health and exercise-savvy; they serve as great role models for me, and the example they set helps me make positive health choices.

6. Learning about new opportunities - A former roommate turned me on to a cheap yoga pass that allowed me to take classes at 12 different yoga studios for one month. Not bad!

7. Being the social animal that you are - Humans are social animals - period. You can always go into your room and close the door, and there will always be times when everyone else is out. But it's healthy to have available a constant stream of social interactions.

8. Softening your rough edges - (Significant others are great for this, but so are roommates.)

9. Built-in cooking instruction - You could be lucky enough to share an apartment with people who love to cook and want to help you learn.

10. Laughing more - I don't know about you, but I laugh more when I'm around people.

11. Opportunities to give and grow  - Compassion and the chance to give to others are, I think, key to happiness. That can take the form of running an errand for a roommate, listening to him talk about his day at work, or lending her your hair dryer. All of it will make you feel good.

12. Learning about a neighborhood gem or good take-out (How else would you have known?)

13. Saving money - It's usually cheaper, or at least more cost-effective, to rent a room in a 3-bedroom than to rent a studio or 1-bedroom.

It is said that if you go to a monastery for a retreat or period of study and ask to be assigned a volunteer post away from people, you will be given the opposite. The monks know, and I am learning, that those of a solitary nature would do well to force themselves to interact with others.

Consider subletting a room in an apartment with friends of friends or even with complete strangers, provided you can meet them or at least learn in advance about their lives and habits. It helps, of course, to live with respectful, responsible roommates with whom you have at least a few interests in common.

Learn from your roommates and try to cultivate their best habits.  It just might make you a better, happier person.

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